people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
I'm at breakfast still drunk holding a blow up parrot
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
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You tried to poop in the sink last night.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I hope my tampon is in his bed. That'll teach him. Happy new years btw
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Why is there a water bottle full of red wine on my desk this morning?
See you tonight.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
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