im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
