Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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