I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
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