I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
We had sex on a dog bed..
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Randomize
