O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Randomize
