I bet he comes in French.
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm about to start putting my tampons in the microwave for a few seconds these plastics applicators and this weather don't mix
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
