Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
