A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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