Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
