So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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