I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
Randomize
