It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
