Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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