Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You yelled to anyone that tried to help you "I have a burrito, what else could a girl want?"
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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