Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
