She is in my trunk
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Randomize
