She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Randomize
