I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
Randomize