We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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