she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
i went to go through my sent box of drunk texts from last night and they were all deleted... i'm going to assume drunk me made the executive decision that sober me would be better off not knowing what they said
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
You pole danced in your parka.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Why the fuck is there raw bacon in my bra. I don't even have a stove.
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