My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
Oh god. I finally realized why the coked out Stevie wonder was explaining the concept of movember to the McDonalds clerk. Drunk me didn't process that another month comes after Halloween... It's apparently November.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
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