She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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