I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
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