He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
