Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
