I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
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