I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
