You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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