you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
He came in looking for condoms, iced coffee, and a gas tank. I need to be where he's going.
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Randomize
