Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Fuck appropriateness.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Your boyfriends underwear are hanging from my kitchen window. Where the fuck are you?!
I fell asleep in the bathroom during my mothers dinner party with no pants on. Her friend walked In. I was told to not come back.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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