just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
Randomize
