would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i'm pretty sure god just pointed at me and laughed
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Randomize