My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
anyone who says having children is the best experience of their life obviously has never seen a vending machine carry vodka in Capri sun pouches.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
Randomize
