I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
So vagazzling was a success
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
