Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I think the fact that I stole someone's mail and broke my big toe means that I should consider taking some time away from vodka
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
