No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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