I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
