Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Randomize
