i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
