she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
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