I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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