i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
What a dumb baby whore.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
Randomize
