I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
