What a fucking waste of an outfit
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
