her vagine was all disorganized.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
Randomize
