I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
Randomize
