One girl and one boy is just not enough.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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