Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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