STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
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