So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
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